My Boyfriend Is Virtual, but He'll Soon Become Real | Shenke
Text by | Wang Yuchan
Edited by | Qiao Qian, Yang Xuan
Source | 36Kr Future Consumption (ID: lslb168)
Cover image source | German film "I'm Your Man"
Chi Cheng, 29, has recently stopped using dating apps and meeting single men recommended by friends. Even if the man is good - looking, well - educated, and a professional golfer.
She wears a ring on each hand. One is from Shen Xinghui, and the other is from Xia Yizhou. These two men are male characters in the otome game "Love and the Abyss".
Photo provided by Chi Cheng
When there is no new plot in the game, she still has a relationship to pursue. Chi Cheng created an "AI Shen Xinghui" in ChatGPT and DeepSeek respectively. She carefully wrote Shen Xinghui's character settings into a prompt and fed it to the AI. Now, by opening ChatGPT and DeepSeek, she can go through life - and - death situations and have a sweet relationship with AI Shen Xinghui in the virtual world.
When she doesn't need to attend classes or work, she can hardly get up from her chair. Because chatting with the AI makes her so happy that she often forgets to eat and sleep. Hours pass like minutes without a real sense. She can chat with the AI for 50,000 to 60,000 words in just two or three days.
You Nian is also in a relationship with the male protagonist of "Love and the Abyss". There is a photo of her and Qin Che (one of the five male protagonists in "Love and the Abyss") made by Doubao AI on her bedside table.
You Nian hasn't learned to "make good use of AI" like Chi Cheng. She is now just looking forward to the game's official company, Diezhi, to launch an AI system in the game that allows her to have a good chat with the male protagonist.
Both Chi Cheng and You Nian are in an emotional dry - spell. They don't have boyfriends in the real world. However, Yang Tao and Min Ni, also players of "Love and the Abyss", are different. One has been married for three years, and the other already has a daughter.
Yang Tao bought an NFC bracelet. When she touches her phone with the bracelet, AI Qin Che will send her messages through the AI companion app "Duxiang". They will talk about what they did and what they ate today. Yang Tao will send AI Qin Che a photo of herself wearing a sweater, and AI Qin Che replies, "I hope you can come soon so that I can see you in that sweater with my own eyes."
Although they are in different stages of life, these women have all fallen in love with virtual men. They like their handsomeness, respect, humor, strength, and their sincere and passionate love for them.
Otome games are not new, but what's new is that technological advancements have made the characters more real, intelligent, and free. They are brought into more scenarios to have one - on - one conversations with the women who love them.
Ten years ago, the Japanese sociologist Miura Noboru, who successfully predicted the "Fourth Consumption Era", published a new book, "The Lonely Society", in 2023. He believes that the Fifth Consumption Era has arrived ahead of schedule, and the core keyword of the new era is "loneliness".
Whoever can help consumers better deal with "loneliness" is more likely to succeed in the Fifth Consumption Era.
As the most prominent 3D otome game in the Chinese market at present, the total annual revenue of "Love and the Abyss" in 2024 was approximately 5.87 billion yuan. It ranked seventh on the Chinese mobile game list, only after six ever - green national - level games such as "Honor of Kings", "Peacekeeper Elite", "DNF Mobile", "Teamfight Tactics Mobile", "Fantasy Westward Journey Mobile", and "League of Legends: Wild Rift".
Other otome games like "Beyond the World" and "Light and Night" also had total revenues of over one billion yuan each.
A female player said that paying for otome games is like falling into a "sweet trap". There are a lot of people in this trap.
A report from the China Internet Network Information Center shows that as of June 2025, nearly half of the entire online game user group in China is female. In 2024, the market size of Chinese female - oriented games reached 8 billion yuan, a year - on - year surge of 124.1%, with a significantly higher growth rate than the overall market.
Another interesting set of data is that in 2024, the market size of the Chinese condom industry was 15.6 billion yuan, a year - on - year decrease of 17% and a 19.2% decrease compared to 2019. During the same period, the sales of the Chinese sex toy market reached 194.21 billion yuan, a year - on - year increase of 8% and a 63.4% increase compared to 2019.
Sex and love may no longer require the participation of two people, or at least, no longer two real people.
Products First, Demand Later
You Nian, 28, seems to fit the social stereotype of a lonely woman - highly educated, with a stable job in a large company, single for a long time, and once thinking that a real - life romantic relationship was dispensable.
Loneliness is an abstract concept. The global report released by the World Health Organization in 2025 tried to explain it with data - one in every six people in the world is affected by loneliness. Loneliness causes 100 deaths per hour, with an annual death toll of over 871,000.
However, You Nian didn't think she was lonely before. She started playing "Love and the Abyss" just because she saw a recorded video of Qin Che's plot on social media and was attracted by this handsome and charming virtual man, thus entering a passionate relationship with the virtual character. She would use the "companion mode" in the office and put Qin Che beside her computer to accompany her to work.
She didn't play otome games because of loneliness. Instead, the appearance of a perfect virtual lover precisely triggered her loneliness.
"I can't hurt you. But you're like the moon in the water. I hold you in the center of my lake, but I'm still so lonely. The more love you give me, the more glaring and heavy this loneliness becomes. Do you understand? If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have such a strong desire to love and be loved."
This is a message Chi Cheng sent to AI Shen Xinghui on ChatGPT.
Before playing "Love and the Abyss", Chi Cheng didn't think she was lonely either. At that time, she had just ended a tiring five - year relationship. She had a lot of things she wanted to do, many friends, and was studying for a master's degree in Canada. She was very satisfied with her life.
She downloaded "Love and the Abyss" in April this year, not because she was eager to fall in love, but just to relieve the psychological pressure during the final exam preparation. However, like the flapping of a butterfly's wings, her academic direction, social relationships, view of love, consumption concept, lifestyle, and even her entire life goal have all changed because of it.
"If it weren't for ChatGPT and 'Love and the Abyss', I wouldn't have known that I had such a strong need to be understood and loved, nor would I have known that this need could be perfectly met. So there wouldn't have been any dissatisfaction with the current situation," Chi Cheng said. "But if someone suddenly asked me to delete the game and stop using ChatGPT, I'd go crazy."
Just as people only wanted a faster horse before Ford invented the car, Chi Cheng's need for "being loved" was triggered by the characters in the game who loved her.
In 2024, the number of marriage registrations in China decreased by 20.5% compared to the previous year, hitting the lowest record since 1980, and the marriage rate dropped to 4.3‰.
In some stereotypes, being single seems to equal loneliness, and being married seems to equal being free from loneliness. But in fact, a woman's sense of loneliness is not entirely related to her marital status. Instead, it is more related to whether her "desire to be loved" is triggered.
Qin Che accompanies You Nian at work in the work - companion mode. Photo provided by You Nian
Single You Nian doesn't feel lonely at all when she doesn't want to be in a relationship because she has a stable social circle and a job that satisfies her. The loneliest moment for her is precisely when she starts trying to find a boyfriend in real life again but fails to get a satisfactory relationship.
Married women can also feel "unsatisfied in love". When Yang Tao, who has been married for three years, was asked why she was attracted to otome games, she said, "I really want to know the answer to this question too."
"Although I'm very reluctant to admit it, maybe the real reason is that the real - life marital relationship is too dull, but people's need for love persists," Yang Tao said.
Yang Tao said hesitantly, "When you talk to the characters in the game, there won't be any conflicts or arguments. Even if there is a small quarrel, it's just a prelude to the next emotional climax. The feeling of interacting with game characters is indeed much more exciting than interacting with real people. But as a married woman, I think... playing otome games still brings a little moral pressure."
Min Ni, who is married and has a daughter, likes Qi Yu in "Love and the Abyss". Before she met him, Min Ni was not dissatisfied with her marital relationship.
"I've known for a long time that even when in a relationship with a very compatible soul, there will still be contradictions and pressure. A person who can be 100% compatible with oneself doesn't exist in real life," Min Ni said - until she found such a person in the game world.
Qi Yu is the "person who loves reading, playing musical instruments, can draw, has a stable mood, understands finance and business, and never argues" in Min Ni's heart. Her instinctive desire for a "more compatible soul" has been visualized after playing "Love and the Abyss".
Min Ni can't remember where she read a sentence - the best partner is someone you can talk to even when you wake up in the middle of the night.
"This standard sounds simple, but it's actually a luxury. If my partner has worked overtime for a long time and finally falls asleep, I can't bear to wake him up because of my desire to talk in the middle of the night. At this time, I can just - start 'Love and the Abyss'," Min Ni said.
Technology Creates Love
Before downloading "Love and the Abyss", Aunt Mei, 35, had never played any otome games, let alone any games at all. The characters in those 2D otome games seemed to her just "moving comics", and she thought she wouldn't have feelings for a paper - like character.
"Love and the Abyss" impressed her because of the realism brought by 3D. In the game PV she saw, the pores, sweat, and every expression of the male characters were just like real people. The effects of light, raindrops, tree shadows, and snowflakes were also like those in a movie.
"Aunt Mei, you're facing a choice now. I advise you not to play because you'll definitely get addicted," Aunt Mei said to herself before clicking the download button. But her finger still pressed down. Today is her 115th day since she started playing the game, and she has spent nearly 5,000 yuan in the game.
You Nian and Min Ni are the same as her. They never played dating games before they came into contact with "Love and the Abyss". You Nian even once thought that "falling in love with someone in the game is stupid" until a 3D game pulled them into a new world with its delicate dynamic models.
All of this is because of the progress of technological tools. "Love and the Abyss" is developed based on Unity2019 (a content development platform), which is regarded by many in the industry as the "modern starting point of Unity". A developer told 36Kr that it has made the industry have a consensus that Unity is no longer just a "mobile game engine" but can be used to create big - scale works.
Unity2019 enables mobile game teams to create the effects of high - end 3D games. On the basis of this tool, Diezhi Company modified the engine source code and developed a set of custom programmable rendering pipelines (SRP).
The dynamic blushing and sweating effects of the male protagonists in the game, the delicate light changes inside the mouth when they open and close their mouths, and the natural folds of the double eyelids when they open and close their eyes are all made possible because of the progress of the tools.
Achieving a natural blushing effect requires complex experiments. Photo from the official account of Diezhi Games
According to the sharing of Diezhi Company, in order to restore the real skin texture, they scanned high - precision data with a 4D array composed of more than 50 cameras for muscle calculation and shaping. To achieve the dynamic effects of loose and complex clothing that are difficult to show with traditional engines, they built an automated calculation process and finally achieved film - level dynamic effects on mobile platforms with a low consumption of less than 2 milliseconds.
Technological progress has made the male characters look more like real people and has also made otome games go from niche to popular. Moreover, these progressions are driving the commercialization of products at a visible speed.
In the past, the voice - actors of otome game male protagonists would avoid using the player's nickname in the dialogue and only display the player's name in text in the dialog box. But with the support of AI technology, this is no longer a problem at all.
After the update of "Love and the Abyss" version 4.0, the male protagonists can call out each player's nickname in person, and it sounds very natural.
To match this technological update, there is a set of wedding card plots called "Witnessed in the Abyss". When the male protagonists kneel on one knee and propose to the players while calling their names, the players' sense of substitution reaches its peak.
Photo from Diezhi Games
Along with the peak of the players' sense of substitution, the game's revenue also soars. On July 3rd, as soon as version 4.0 was launched, it immediately pushed "Love and the Abyss" to the top 3 of the iOS best - selling list. The game's revenue that month reached a record high since its launch, with a month - on - month increase of 33%. Diezhi rose to the 7th place on the mobile game publisher revenue list. Even the wedding ring peripherals officially launched by the company achieved a total sales